Unhealthy relationships that you might meet

Unhealthy relationships, how do we end up in them, and why do we stay? More importantly, why do we keep seeking them out?

When I say unhealthy relationships I am not just talking about ones in which someone is abused physically or emotionally, but also ones where neither person grows. I think one of the many reasons we do this is because we are not enlighten to anything else. Being niche livers we tend to do what feels safe, so we either stay in the same relationship, or seek out similar ones. I know that is what I did with my marriage.

Not long ago I realized that I tend to be attracted to women who are unavailable for one reason or another. I began to see a pattern occurring, so I started to wonder if I was doing this because I was afraid of commitment, or afraid of being in another failed relationship. After much thought, I can honestly say to myself that it is not a fear of commitment, because I want to be with just one woman, so that leaves me with fear of a failed relationship. I think this would more than likely be the cause. I guess when I find the right person, I will no longer have these fears, because I will know it is right, and nothing else will matter. Wow that was a hard one to open up about, lol.

I think there are a lot of other reasons why we end up in these types of relationships, one of them being that we don¿t always choose the person we want to be with, they choose us. Take my one of my brothers for example. He is a nice guy who is also very shy, but most of the women in his life have used and abused him. I was thinking about how he met most of these women, and sure enough, they were the ones to initiate first contact with him. Not once was he the first to strike up a conversation. He is now married to a really nice girl that he met at his church, and sure enough, he spoke to her first.

I think either consciously, or sub consciously abusive people seek out kind hearted people. They are perfect pray for them. After all, this type of person, the abusive type, is more often than not a coward, so they pick on what they perceive to be weak people.

The moral to this story is; if you let other choose for you, then you get what they give you. If you choose for yourself, then you get what you want.

If you are not happy with the way your life is going, then maybe you should change the way you are living it.